This is a Romanov. She is strikingly beautiful. Though she is not the woman whose photograph would later captivate me, when I saw this image of Princess Olga and she took my breath away...I felt she was a good way to convey how I felt the day I DID see the visage of the stranger on the other end of the phone.

Dear Ether,

Somewhere in Odessa there is a photograph of me.  It might be stored away gently in a envelope.  It may be crudely covered in rubble in a dump.  But somewhere…..somewhere in the Ukraine there is a snapshot of me taken when I was in my mid 20’s.

The original keeper of the photo was a woman I never met.  She spoke no English and I no Russian.  My glossy print sat on her mantelpiece for about 5 years in her modest studio flat.  It shared space with images of her grandchildren, husband and daughter and a few tattered black and white photos that survived the war.

English gent is half Russian.  His mother is this woman’s daughter.  To me she was only known as Babushka.

I only spoke to her a few times on the phone.  I muttered foolish statements that English gent had taught me.  “Ya Loo-Bloo Tibia” (I love you).  She laughed with good nature into the phone and repeated. “Ya Loo-Bloo Tibia Tour-Jah” (I love you too).  It felt sad that I was crippled by language and couldn’t communicate with a woman who I knew had a tremendous history and warmth.  I had never been handicapped by language before—in fact, it was something I was so good at.  I always handed over the receiver feeling like a puppet who’d just done her job entertaining.

One day, I asked to see her photograph during a visit to English gent’s house.  His clan are a family of pale, fair-haired, light eyed, slim people.  Babushka was in her twenties in the photo I was shown.  She couldn’t have been more than 5 feet tall.  She had coffee-colored hair and brown pupils. I know it seems crazy, but I felt a sudden closeness to her.  I felt she was from my stock.  That English gent’s genes had all come from his father’s UK side (and even his mother was shockingly fair—she didn’t resemble Babushka at all).  Though I’m much taller, we were both the dark horses.  I asked English gent’s mom if I could send Babushka MY photo.  I felt if that made me feel a connection to her where words couldn’t, maybe my photo could create the same spark.

When she received my photo, Gent told me she cried.  That she “understood.”  She loved my dark looks—and it made her so happy that he was with someone who reminded her of her heritage.  After that, I made sure no longer to be a marionette on the phone but to have a translator and convey true feelings across the line.

But, as we all know, time is a harsh enemy.  And she was not young.  She no longer could speak on the phone or read letters.  And then she died.  When English gent’s mother went to her flat for the last time, she said she noticed my photo immediately.  It stood out more than the others and looked as though it had been fingered the most.  It was slightly dog-eared and had many fingerprints on its finish.  I like to think that she passed it around for many to see.  By the time Gent’s mom came back to clean the flat, the mantle had been tidied and to this day, those pictures have never resurfaced.

Though we never got to know each other, when we looked into one another’s eyes from so far away, we had an understanding.  I often wonder what my photo got to see in her little flat?  I wonder what aromas surrounded it as she cooked her traditional meals?

Wherever I am in Odessa, decaying in a landfill or safe in a drawer, at least I can say for a moment in time a picture spoke a thousand words for both of us.

Dedicatedly yours,

—One of 365

Ring...Ring...My Normal Dealings On This Holiday.

Dear Ethers,

I hate Thanksgiving.  Yes.  I’m the original Scrooge of this holiday.  I’ve always been grateful to be out of the country whenever November rolls around.  Thrilled to make a quick phone call to my folks, say a half-hearted festive I love you, and then hang-up happy to be freezing in my flat eating Indian food while they munch on turkey.  

Though I do love pumpkin pie.

Why do I dislike this beloved Thursday?  I don’t like the food, (oh god, cranberry mold jiggling on the table next to the gravy with giblets—blechh). I’m not a fan of the forced family get together with relatives gathering asking me questions I DON’T want to answer and the false sense of gratefulness for what, exactly?  I mean, I tend to have more complaints than thanks (I know, I’m a jerk–but you guys know I’m a total pessimist).  Oh, and the hot breath of my dog on my thigh with his eyes bugging out of his head desperate for something, just SOMETHING, is SO pleasant whilst eating.  And he always chooses ME as his bosom buddy.

And I think cornucopia’s are ugly floral display’s, don’t you?

I’m sure you are all “cluck clucking” me about my terrible attitude, but I have to be honest.  

My Mom cooks for two days straight killing herself in the kitchen and dead at night from her toils.  She then becomes mean as hell to everyone around her.  Very festive.  My father, Mr. Perfect, panics if anything is out of place and I begin to worry he might keel over from stress about the few people arriving for dinner. Again, incredibly cheerful. My crazy Aunt S., who has chosen to humiliate me since I’ve been conscious, asks me out loud what bra size I’m sporting these days and then, without permission, lifts up my top and tries to look.  My brother, a total attitude problem at 31, just sits at the piano and is anti-social and rude.  Besides giving me a “noogie” and acting like he’s a frat brother from “Animal House,” there’s really not much else he contributes.  English gent might as well don tails and a bow-tie and put on a heavy Edwardian accent because he ends up being everyone’s bitch.  Need I go on?

Oh, and just this morning The Big Apple Beauty, in town for this “grand event,” took a rolling tumble down our steps.  We all thought she might be dead as she made no noise.  After lying crumpled on the floor for 30 seconds, she got up.  Her perfectly streaked hair looked like she stuck her finger in a socket. She winced and limped outside.  There she remains lying on a chaise lounge moaning with hideous scrapes on her arms.  I’m sure the bruising will start to show any time now.

I detest any meat on the bone and seeing a turkey carcass haunts me.  I hate dark meat and everyone in my family is selfish and takes all the white first.   And yes, my dad might, just might, put on Neil bloody Sedaka in the background.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone–especially to the poor Indians whose land we stole–thank you even more for giving us this holiday.  But hey, at least you guys are gonna have fun tonight at the casinos.  Whose having the last laugh now?

Anyone for roulette?  In my case, I wish it was Russian…….

Dedicatedly yours,

—One of 365

Dear Ether,

I’m the type of girl who normally just throws her hair in a loose bun and runs out of the house, long strands flying loose in my wake.  Often people are surprised when I unravel my tresses and see that I have extremely long locks.  “You look so much better with it down!”  Sigh.  I know I do, Ethers, but I’m lazy.  I just can’t be asked to try with my hair.  Such effort!  But after looking at hair trends this season, I’m going to get my act together and ban the bun!  It’s all about fun and creativity and I can’t wait to make the most of my mane!

Look at the turquoise and metal meshed together in this spectacular head piece from Dolce & Gabbana. It just livens up a simple center part and makes an incredible statement. No need for any jewelry with this on your head!

Embellishments for the hair, whether long or short, are in style and I am so excited about the variety of goodies out on the market.  There’s everything from ribbons made from luxurious fabrics to be tied in oversized bows to thick headbands with exotic and colorful feathers.  And I’m in love with clips bejeweled in an eye-catching array of sparkles so your hair appears as precious as if adorned with real gemstones.

This is so perfect for the "Russian Revolution" look that is on the runways of Chanel. I love the stones and the different fabrics like satin and grosgrain. This will liven up any dead-do.

This trend is a real blast from the past.  In the 1920’s flappers wore fantastic headpieces that dangled and danced as fast as they did the Charleston. In the Victorian era, women wore jet, tortoiseshell, and ivory hair combs that had spectacular carvings that fanned out in their elegant coifs.  Oh, and we mustn’t forget the days of Marie Antoinette!  What wonderful creations she fashioned for the times.  She even wore a sailboat as an adornment in her hair!

We always talk about fly-away hair. Ms. Antoinette had "sail-away" hair. Amazing!

A beautiful tortoiseshell Victorian hair comb. This one is in a fan shape. If you can get your hands on one of these in a antiques shop it would be your "crowning" achievement.

At Givenchy, models were wearing hair stick-straight with stiff-ribbon Alice-Bands in the mid-section of their heads. Severe, yet chic.  Dolce & Gabbana had luxurious turquoise gems and metal bauble headbands tied with satin ribbon onto a center part. Their hair was done up in an intricate bun in the back.  The show “Gossip Girl” has been making use of the head band with its good girl/bad girl character Blair.  She wears the most fab pieces and  many of them have gone missing (wink) after a days shoot.  Even celebs are getting in on the action.  Nicole Ritchie has been sporting the happening-hippie hair look with her self-designed “House of Harlow” chain band that conjures a Cleopatra-esque feel to it.  Mischa Barton has just come out with her own line of halo-like bands and girls like Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and Lily Allen have been tweaking their tresses as well.

Here's our girl Ms. Ritchie sporting her signature golden band that uniquely drapes around her beautifully tousled hair. I love the Boho-Chic aspect of her look.

WOWZA! Look at the selection Mischa Barton has created for her new collection! These really remind me of the roaring 20's!

"Gossip Girl" was always a-HEAD of the game when it came to adornments for the hair. Look at this array! Jealous?

I personally love the dressy version of the look.  I think it’s great to do the hippie, braided style for a casual day out, but what I think is so special about this trend is that it dresses up your hair and makes it unique.  You don’t always have to be  big and over-the-top with a black-tie look.  A little Swarovski clip in your hair is understated and elegant.  An embellished hair-tie is a perfect touch or even just tying a funky patterned bow in a half part through your hair instead of leaving it down gives it that extra zip.

If any of you are thinking, “This is a look that is too young for me,” you’re wrong!  Any gal at any age can wear her hair up in a chignon with a beautiful comb in an elegant design.  It adds to the beauty of your style, and it is certainly not too immature.  In fact, it’s a classic.  Another lovely look for a more mature woman would be a low clip holding the hair with some beautiful stones attached.  Designer hair baubles are a great way to go if you want a bit of trendiness with just a touch of bling.

This signature Chanel camelia hair comb is classic. It's perfect for any age and is timeless and versatile.

So whether you go a la Marie Antoinette and really go for a “hair-raising” experience or more subtle like old Queen Vic and keep it cool and collected, treat yourself to a little bit of sass this season.

Dedicatedly yours,

—One of 365