Dear Ether,

I’ve never been a fan of seeing a dog in a more expensive coat than I own.  I’ve never thought it was cute watching a maltipoo trot down the street wearing a ballerina outfit with a nicer manicure than I could afford.  Oh god, and the LV carrying cases that these little animals get schlepped around in!  I can’t believe the waste of such fine Italian leather.  And here’s the catch—I’m a dog lover.  And maybe BECAUSE I’m a dog lover, I really see this as a travesty because I know if these dogs could see what they looked like (well, comprehend it) they would be humiliated.  I know “dog parents” mean well.  I really do. But when you’ve seen a chihuahua in a stroller and a poodle with braces like I have—you just can’t help feeling somewhat jaded by the whole thing.

I got an E-mail from Ralph Lauren announcing their Fall sale.  Curious, as I always am for a bargain, I clicked on the link to peruse.  Out of the corner of my eye I saw a poor creature dressed in a fucking rugby shirt and another one in a puffer jacket—-with a hood.  WHAT!  I had to see what else Mr. Lauren had on offer. Loads.  Alligator collars for $500.  Shearling jackets.  Oh, you could even snag for your loved one a little Ralph Lauren sweater with the Polo insignia crocheted into the back in bright orange–very understated.

I know there are women who live on Park Avenue who never had children and this feeds their fancy.  Or, women who DO have children and want the dog to blend right into the family.  There are also chavs who love their labels and MAN this is a great way to make their little one look as “pucka’” as they do.  So, I’ve decided to allow you to make the decision for yourself.  To maybe prove me wrong.  Here are the photos from the site.  Tell me what you think?

Me?  Well, I’m sure the title of this entry tells all.  But if you think the kit is Bow-WOWZA and I am nuts to think it is WOOF….then lemme know.  Hey, every dog has its day……of reckoning.

Dedicatedly yours,

—One of 365