This is a Romanov. She is strikingly beautiful. Though she is not the woman whose photograph would later captivate me, when I saw this image of Princess Olga and she took my breath away...I felt she was a good way to convey how I felt the day I DID see the visage of the stranger on the other end of the phone.
Dear Ether,
Somewhere in Odessa there is a photograph of me. It might be stored away gently in a envelope. It may be crudely covered in rubble in a dump. But somewhere…..somewhere in the Ukraine there is a snapshot of me taken when I was in my mid 20’s.
The original keeper of the photo was a woman I never met. She spoke no English and I no Russian. My glossy print sat on her mantelpiece for about 5 years in her modest studio flat. It shared space with images of her grandchildren, husband and daughter and a few tattered black and white photos that survived the war.
English gent is half Russian. His mother is this woman’s daughter. To me she was only known as Babushka.
I only spoke to her a few times on the phone. I muttered foolish statements that English gent had taught me. “Ya Loo-Bloo Tibia” (I love you). She laughed with good nature into the phone and repeated. “Ya Loo-Bloo Tibia Tour-Jah” (I love you too). It felt sad that I was crippled by language and couldn’t communicate with a woman who I knew had a tremendous history and warmth. I had never been handicapped by language before—in fact, it was something I was so good at. I always handed over the receiver feeling like a puppet who’d just done her job entertaining.
One day, I asked to see her photograph during a visit to English gent’s house. His clan are a family of pale, fair-haired, light eyed, slim people. Babushka was in her twenties in the photo I was shown. She couldn’t have been more than 5 feet tall. She had coffee-colored hair and brown pupils. I know it seems crazy, but I felt a sudden closeness to her. I felt she was from my stock. That English gent’s genes had all come from his father’s UK side (and even his mother was shockingly fair—she didn’t resemble Babushka at all). Though I’m much taller, we were both the dark horses. I asked English gent’s mom if I could send Babushka MY photo. I felt if that made me feel a connection to her where words couldn’t, maybe my photo could create the same spark.
When she received my photo, Gent told me she cried. That she “understood.” She loved my dark looks—and it made her so happy that he was with someone who reminded her of her heritage. After that, I made sure no longer to be a marionette on the phone but to have a translator and convey true feelings across the line.
But, as we all know, time is a harsh enemy. And she was not young. She no longer could speak on the phone or read letters. And then she died. When English gent’s mother went to her flat for the last time, she said she noticed my photo immediately. It stood out more than the others and looked as though it had been fingered the most. It was slightly dog-eared and had many fingerprints on its finish. I like to think that she passed it around for many to see. By the time Gent’s mom came back to clean the flat, the mantle had been tidied and to this day, those pictures have never resurfaced.
Though we never got to know each other, when we looked into one another’s eyes from so far away, we had an understanding. I often wonder what my photo got to see in her little flat? I wonder what aromas surrounded it as she cooked her traditional meals?
Wherever I am in Odessa, decaying in a landfill or safe in a drawer, at least I can say for a moment in time a picture spoke a thousand words for both of us.
At 8 years old I was kidnapped from a school by an old man. This is a true story. For 7 hours I was alone with him in his apartment. There was nothing sinister. He was simply lonely.
I had been playing soccer since I was 4 years old at Fairfax High School in Los Angeles. Anyone could come and watch our games. There were many soccer fields set up at once for all the events going on over the weekends and with so many kids, there was chaos.
It was half time and my mom, who was team-captain, was handing out Gatorade and apple slices to hyper players. Sitting on an aluminum bench scraped with graffiti sat this innocent looking gentleman. I remember exactly what he looked like to this day. He was wearing khakis, argyle socks, black sneakers, a sky-blue lightweight sweater with a white shirt underneath and a flat cap. He wore heavy rimmed glasses. He beckoned me over and asked me about the game. I thought he was someone’s grandfather so I tried to be polite. I plunked down next to him and after a few more questions was itching to go back to my teammates and gossip. As I started to get up this feeble man suddenly had a strong grip. He told me that he wanted to show me something at his house. I told him I couldn’t go because I was in the middle of a game. He started to pull me. When I called out my mother’s name she couldn’t hear me. When I tried again, he covered my mouth.
He kept pulling me until he pushed me into the front seat of a very old Buick. He locked the doors and said he only wanted to talk to me for a few hours and then he’d bring me back. I was hysterically crying. I could see my mom’s black hair in the distance, her head bent over handing out cups to kids. I wondered when she would notice I was missing.
His apartment was in a retirement home only a block from the school. It was a swirl of oranges and browns with a lot of stripes and plaids thrown in. His rug was the color of pea soup. I remember because I sat on it without budging for hours. The strange thing is he simply turned on the TV and watched, commenting on a joke or a line every so often. I recall never feeling threatened for my life, just missing my parents and feeling chilly because I was in shorts and a T-shirt from my uniform.
He never offered me food or showed me the bathroom. But he was very protective of the phone and the door. He wasn’t a complete fool. I kept asking him if we could go back to the school. I asked him whose grandpa he was (I still didn’t understand he had nothing to do with my team). I looked around to see if he had any pictures of family. There were none. Everything was so tidy.
I was patient. Incredibly patient. And he was very quiet. I was so confused. Time just kept ticking away.
And then there was terrible rapping on the door.
“Police, open up NOW!”
My captor did not budge. I did not budge.
The door was knocked off its hinges and there were a handful of cops who grabbed me by my shirt and hair and pulled me off the floor. They carried me downstairs in a rush to my parents who were white as ghosts and held me with all of their might. That was the first time I had seen my dad cry. A female police officer asked me if I had been touched, and I said no. They took me to the doctor anyway. It was humiliating.
The man never explained to anyone why he took ME specifically or why he took anyone at all. He had no record and was not senile. He was given a restraining order.
From then on my mom never let me out of her sight anywhere. Eventually she let up when I got older, but she watched me like a hawk. She said she failed me as a mother and would have killed herself if anything had happened to me. She later told me that the hours I was gone she had collected sleeping pills and was going to take them with a huge slug of alcohol if I had been found dead. She, to this day, says she has never been closer to death in her life (and Ethers, she has had a life-threatening illness……..I’ll write about that one day).
I’ve had many weird and wonderful things happen to me in my life. I know the man who kidnapped me is long dead. But I’ll always wonder what those lost hours spent between us meant. Why they happened and what their significance was. He could have stolen everything, I’m so lucky he just got away with 420 minutes.
I have been running around like a chicken with its head cut-off for the last few days and have been very grateful for clothing that has allowed me to look like I didn’t just roll out of bed but kept me comfortable and able to be on the move. It’s impossible to jump from one appointment to another in 4″ heels (or try driving in them) and unless I need to be really dressy for an event, for the most part, I can keep it casual. It’s also warm in L.A. so I want to be wearing light gear that’s gonna allow me to move and shake. No short skirts where knickers might be shown or stifling shirts wear I have pit stains to prove my stress. So, for this fabulous Fashion Friday, I am dedicating it to the woman on the move. The woman who wants to look halfway decent, on-trend and chic but can’t be struggling in stilettos whilst doing it. I’m talking leggings, a barely there racer-back silk tank, comfy bejeweled flats and a rockin’ hipslung belt to tie it all together. This look is great for Mom’s who need to throw on something quick but wanna be the hottest ticket on the playground. Students who are late for class and need to jump into something FAST. And just anyone who wants to look put together but not suffer the consequences. And the best part–the whole outfit cost me under $150!!!!! Hey, you know I’m the queen bee of deals. Oh, and I feel like the leggings and the top make me look heavier than the photograph is portraying I know on Twitter I have been talking about what a chunk I have become….but honestly, this IS really the camera! The tank is actually really billowy and hangs beautifully and the leggings—well, they just photograph badly. What can I say–well, it’s what I always say. I never claim to be Kate Moss nor does my photographer claim to be Mario Testino. Bah! Excuses, excuses. I hope you enjoy and get inspired to be free and fashionable!!!!
This is soooo comfy!! The belt is there for adornment so it is loose and not constrictive. The tank is made of silk and is oversized so it breathes and the leggings have an elastic waist. What could be more comfortable? And those flats! They have a little peep-toe so your foot breathes and they allow you to boogie around the city because there is no restrictive heel. Gotta love it.
This racer-back tank is made of silk and air! It's oversized with large cut armholes and it feels barely there. It has a slight stretch to it in case you'd want to wear it tighter, but it really is meant to be worn loose and baggy. I love the zebra print with brown, white and pink colors and get this---Nicole Richie owns the exact same one!!!!! Pair this with white trousers to dress it up, jeans to funk it out or leggings to be your comfy self. Decolette Tank, Originally $250, paid $25, Vionette Boutique, Los Angeles
It doesn't get any easier than this! Plain cotton mix leggings with an elastic waist (you guys KNOW how much I love that) are the new jean. They are a fashion staple and if you don't own a pair go out and grab at least one in black. They are so great for just throwing on and using as a layering piece. Pair with boots and a sweater or a tunic and sandals. Leggings are so versatile and comfortable--everyone is wearing them. They look good on almost all body types. They look GREAT with heels, hard to pull off with flats (you see I'm struggling in the photo) and killer with the new over-the-knee boot trend coming this Fall. Brown Leggings, $6.99, Target, Los Angeles
The most expensive piece in this whole outfit. I just like how this belt adds a little funk to the look and breaks up the leggings from the tank. I love a hipslung belt and I think if you have wide hips it can help minimize them. I adore the grommets and the oversized buckle. I've owned this belt for 5 years and it has been such a great investment piece. Jocasi Belt, 65 Pounds, Topshop London
Flats are a must for comfort and for a woman on the go. How can you move and groove in sky-high heels? Impossible! I love these because your feet won't get sweaty because of the peep-toe and the fabric is a nice grosgrain so it's not gonna be sweaty like leather. I also love the color which is a fun and cheerful pink which meshes beautifully with the top and I think goes well with brown. And the little jewels! They are so lovely and add a bit of fun to the whole flat making them not only functional but fashionable. Pink Flats, Originall 35 Pounds Sterling, paid 10 Pounds Sterling, Topshop London
So, I found this really groovy store on La Cienega in West Hollywood en route to my gym which is on Sunset. It’s the most amazing little place. Stationed between a car wash and a crummy parking lot, it’s the sleekest little boutique with a white awning. Written in the coolest black lettering simply states the name Opening Ceremony. I’d driven by a few times and wondered what this place was all about. Was it a club, a restaurant? The LAST thing I expected for it to be was the most unique clothing store I’d been to in Los Angeles thus far. Opening Ceremony carries everything from their own label (which is very Euro-vintage) and Topshop to Acne Jeans and bonkers labels you’ve never heard of. I was thrilled when I walked into their groovy labyrinth where their very attractive and well-dressed staff point you in all directions so you can get lost in this candy shop of clothing, shoes, accessories and more. I was thrilled to see a whole rack of Topshop, though it was mainly the Kate Moss collection. It was ridiculously expensive (Londoners, if you thought you paid through the roof for the scraggle-toothed waifs creations, try buying a tank-top for $100 where they even have the chutzaph to leave the UK tag on that says 25 quid. Um. No.) So, even though I couldn’t afford a single thing in this hot-house for hipsters, I thought if they had a website it would be great to share their wonderful world with you. So I was thrilled when I Googled the shop and found out they did indeed sell online. Their collection is SO much more limited on their website then what they have to offer in store, but you still get the groove factor from the cool graphics, off-beat models and unique clothing selections. If you’re looking for a brand that nobody else is really going to be sporting, or a label that is uber cool that you’d see the likes of Sienna Miller wearing, than you’ve hit the right spot. Opening Ceremony likes to show that they don’t carry the regular stuff that your local mall does–but truthfully you’ll have to pay. The stuff ain’t cheap, even on sale.
The “Wish List” look this week is all about travel and getting upgraded to First Class when you’re flying. Why shell out the big bucks on a plane seat when you could spend it on an outfit you’ll wear for ages! Even if you spend 24 grueling hours flying, the amount of money you spent on a First Class ticket could buy you a runway look that will make you the envy of all your friends and may even get you snapped by “The Satorialist.” I could have chosen a wack-a-doodle outfit from Opening Ceremony (and trust me, if you visit their shop or site, you can see nutty stuff. Chloe Sevigny has her own label there, just to give you some idea!) but I wanted to pick something that was unique, still wearable, and that would be comfy to fly in. And when you nonchalantly ask the narrow-eyed flight attendant about being upgraded, she’ll take one look at you and say to herself, “yep, this girl is used to high-flyin’ style.” The only thing that it’ll cost you is the price of an economy class seat and some killer clothes from this choice selection. So, get out your passport, dust off your luggage and get your doctor to prescribe you some sleeping pills because honey, you are about to see some duds that will get you an oversized leather seat, champagne and rid you of that screaming kid who keeps peering over his chair making crazy eyes at you (don’t you hate that!).
I love this jacket because it sort of has that fencing coat feel, but also an old-fashioned bodice look to it too. I adore the darting. The lines will hug your body and show off your figure in all of the right places. The arms are cut long so they will give the appearance of elongating your limbs. The front zip is handy, making the jacket easy to take on and off. This is perfect for when you fly (the temperatures in those planes are so unpredictable!). The material is also great. A mix of cotton and rayon, this lovely jacket won't wrinkle too badly so you'll leave the plane as crisp as you entered it. G. V. G. V. Arch Braid Zip-Up Jacket In Beige, Originally $1,025 now $513, openingceremony.com
You're going to be in the clouds anyway so why not represent the mood of the flight? The attendants will appreciate YOUR appreciation for their jobs (okay, maybe I'm taking this a bit too far) but it is a cute thought, no? I just loved how light and airy this top was. It looked like a watercolor painting and I loved how the fluffiness of the blouse mimicked the fluffiness of the clouds. It's actually hand printed in Japan, and I reckon just a lovely summertime top. It think it will layer nicely under the cotton jacket because the fabric is so thin (the jacket really needs to not have anything too bulky underneath as it is so snug, it fits like a top in its own right). Made of silk and cotton, you'll be breathing fresher air in this ethereal piece of cloth in the front of the cabin then in the back, that's for sure. Wakana Koike Fluffy Cloud Blouse, $300, openingceremony.com
Don't these just look comfortable? The loose tied waist? The wide legs? The linen and cotton blend? The chilled out Japanese-inspired cut? You know they'll just sit well on you, be a great fit and won't make you sweat bullets in the summer heat but protect you from the sun. I think the cloud blouse would look lovely tucked into the trousers showing off the tied waist and I like the idea of the natural looking jacket and pants matching together to make a really "green" look. And if you spill champagne on these compliments of First Class, I bet you it won't even show! United Bamboo Baggy Pants, Originally $405 now $122, openingceremony.com
I really like these because they tie the whole outfit together in a glamorous way without being too "bling" but show you have style and know your fashion. They are architecturally very interesting with the layering of the suede. The heel is almost like a bamboo reed, and they just look comfortable. They work with the whole organic look of the outfit. It's like you aren't trying too hard, but you're letting people know you've got style. That's what the flight attendant's will pick up about you. That you aren't pushy, but you know what you want and you get it. They'll see you "own it" and they'll wanna give it to you. High-heels=high-flying. Hussein Chalayan Flap Boot, Originally $849 now $249, openingceremony.com
If you want to "bag the deal" you can't be schleping around a beaten up purse that says "there is a hole in the lining of this baby that has about $3 worth of parking meter change in it that I can pull out if I turn it upside down." You need to look like you're carrying important things in an important case. This will hold all of your key documents and even a small laptop. It goes beautifully with the colors of your outfit and is crisp and clean for summer. Want Les Essentials De La Vie Bag, $625, openingceremony.com
Any hot-mama traveller sports major shades. Even if it's nighttime. Crazy. I know. That's why these babies are good, because the tint isn't too dark so you won't look totally nuts if you have a evening flight. These vintage inspired sunnies are wonderful with the whole bohemian-sleek look of your outfit and just add that finishing touch to make you look polished. If you've had a rough night, they won't be able to see it in your face (these are HUGE) and if it comes to a stare down for that upgrade, you're hiding behind lenses and they're not. Who do YOU think is gonna win? Linda Farrow Vintage For Charles Anastase Sunglasses ca1-c6, $275, openingceremony.com
I love Monday’s because they mean I can go virtual shopping on some amazing websites and style dream outfits that I would love to wear had I had the bank account of a movie-star. BUT, maybe 1 of you Ethers DO have an enviable credit card limit and can splurge, or might be inspired by the choices from the “The Wish List” and look to your favorite shops for inspiration. What matters most is that I LOVE doing it and I think you guys LOVE seeing it so it shall continue being a weekly staple to help get the dreaded 5-day toil over and done with. It’s a dream that as a magazine writer I wish I could have the liberty to do, but never would be given the space or creativity to do it.
And speaking of work, it’s the recession so many of us are looking for new jobs. This means interviews! I think what separates the men from the boys is often the little details. The cuff-link or the finely-cut suit. But we’re talking womenswear right now, so I’m focusing on being fashion forward but classic. Beautifully made clothes that are cut to perfection, but are simple in design with a pop of personality. I think these days you need to stand out slightly by wearing something a little different than a boring black suit and white button down shirt with black heels. Truthfully, I’ve never gone for a job on Wall Street or to work for a top law firm. So, the choices that I’ve made today might be totally inappropriate (though I don’t know if nowadays places are hipper and want a chicer looking employee).
I went with fashion label Marni, a favorite of mine for years (even though all I’ve been able to do is stand awe-struck through their windows and look at their amazing stores with their minimalist curved hangers and beautifully patterned clothing). I think they embody European, and especially Italian fashion design. With their architectural cuts, Impressionist colors, Marni provides must-have wardrobe staples but gives you the extra edge so you’re always tweaked, looking slightly ahead of the game and never fully part of the crowd. In a nutshell I would call them avant-garde in a way that is very wearable so you’ll always look interesting and different without looking too risky.
Marni began in 1994 as a family business (the Castiglioni’s) who were fur producers to the best fashion houses, but they also wanted to have their own stake in the fashion game. It all began with a women’s collection designed by Consuelo that was eclectic, tailored, researched and unique. A huge success, Marni continues to create “holistic collections for markets that have become more receptive to innovative Italian design.” (Marni.com) Marni also decided not to have a strict advertising campaign which has allowed editor’s to create amazing creations with their clothing each season which has actually given them a lot more coverage had they had stricter look-book structures.
So with your history lesson, a bit of love for the brand from me, and keeping in mind what this outfit is going to be worn for here goes:
It all begins with the wrapping paper when you open the gift, right? Well, this is quite some paper! This coat will set the standard for the rest of the outfit. It looks hand dyed, the colors are that of Italy with its sepia tones and the material is perfect for summer and fall. Made of silk and linen organza, this is a mix n' match version of the trench but with asymmetrical lines, cuffs that are like a dress shirt and a unique belted trapeze shaping. Sun and Violet Runway Duster, Originally $2, 250 now $1,125 Marni.com
Bringing out the ruddy reddish brown in the duster and complimenting the asymmetrical lines as well, this top is ideal. Though it is a plain color, its architectural design is unique so even when you remove your striking outer layer, you still are wearing an interesting piece. You also don't want to compete with too many different patterns so the plain color with the extraordinary detail is the perfect combination (though Marni is famous for making patterns come together that blow your mind!). Cotton and Silk Top w/ Pocket Detail. Originally $630 now $315 Marni.com
Sleek, slick and a perfect cut are always what you want to look for in a trouser. Italy is famous for its tailoring and Marni prides itself on this tradition. The color, once again, compliments the duster, but also will work with the rest of your ensemble once it is removed. Great for any occasion, these are just a wonderful wardrobe staple. Cotton Cady Trousers Originally $630 now $315 Marni.com
I have to say, when the shoe selection came up on the screen, I almost fainted and had to be resuscitated. They have a massive selection and it was tough to choose, but I went with this killer heel. I really liked that it tied all the colors together, I thought the leather cutting detail was extraordinary, the heel looked thick enough to walk in and the platform looked hefty enough so you wouldn't die from ball-of-foot pain. I also think these would make your legs look authoratative in those trousers (hey, the less you have to shorten, the taller you are, right?) and if you wore them for going out they'd make your legs look seriously sexy. Hematite Leather Sandals Originally $850 now $425 Marni.com
Okay, I thought, how could I scrape together the cash for this bag? I could sell my computer, but then how would I write? Or, sell English gent for escorting, but he regretfully declined (damn those English manners!). If anyone from Marni is out there, here is my pathetic plea--if you have a bag that you don't want and were gonna toss in the bin because maybe a stitch was off, e-mail me. I will be your indentured servant for all time. Okay. Pathetic begging over. I LOVE THIS BAG. It is big, beautiful and brings out the color of the duster and the top--it just defines everything in this outfit. The tiers in the leather are once again playing on the architectural thought process of the Marni brain. The bag is functional and perfect for your interview with its space for paperwork, but it also is the perfect city bag that just will age beautifully. This is an investment piece because it will last you a lifetime. Bella! Bandoliers Tourmaline Leather Bag Originally $1,975 now $988 Marni.com
Marni had really fun and organic accessories. I went with these bracelet/bangles. They are within the color scheme and when you take of the duster and have the sleeveless top on, they'll look great on your bare arms. Lovely. Horn Bracelet Embellished With Applique Ruffle Originally $325 now $163 Marni.com
Marni had really fun and organic accessories. I went with these bracelet/bangles. They are within the color scheme and when you take of the duster and have the sleeveless top on, they'll look great on your bare arms. Lovely. Horn Wavy Bangle Originally $290 now $145 Marni.com
I couldn't resist! It's so rare that a label has such lovely lingerie too. And why not be decked out from top to bottom. This 90% cotton 10% silk bra is extremely luxurious, cute and is just a wonderful little treat. Green and Pink Bra Originally $325 now $163 Marni.com
You knew these knickers were coming too! Yes they might be slightly large, but I hate those teensy pants that veer a little too close to, well, I don't want to get graphic. I like a roomy pair of trunks. These are just adorable and so European. Can't you just see a cutie in the 50's sitting in her flat in Italy in this bra and underwear smoking a cigarette, sipping an espresso and peeking out her balcony for her beau to arrive? Ahhhh....those were the days. Green and Pink Briefs, originally $235 now $118 Marni.com
Well, I have given you quite the outfit to choose from. I think this is the biggest selection yet, thanks to Marni’s amazing Website. And remember, I have ZERO affiliation with the brands that I pick so I’m not trying to sell you anything. Think of this as an editorial spread. I hope you enjoyed this and good luck on your interview you hot ticket! You deserve the job if you are looking THIS stylish. Since I put a lot of work into putting this fab frock together I expect you to VOTE! No one ever seems to and I really am curious to know what you think. So, take the 10 seconds and click on the button….please…otherwise, you can buy me the above bag! Which is cheaper and easier? Yeah, I thought so………
Step out of the Ether and send me an E-mail. I would be glad to have your thoughts, feelings and ideas.
