Welcome to the Vintage Valentino catwalk in L.A.! I promised you if I could take pics I would and so I'm here to deliver. I'm usually under a tight-lipped contract so I can't share anything glam with you guys, but because I went as a civilian and not a reporter, I could spill all. Enjoy the show

Dear Ethers,

When I go to any ritzy event it always has a catch—I have to work.  I hope one day to be able to attend a glam party or a wonderful opening based on the generosity of creative friends or because I have the money to afford to buy a ticket.  But as it stands, the only way I get into things is by covering them as a journalist.  It was much better in London when I was a beauty writer.  I didn’t have to deal with celebs at parties ever and when there was an actual party, not just a small tea, it was really contained and lovely. In L.A. it’s not like that.  The events I go to are like mad, “Girls Gone Wild” parties.  Often there can be sweaty, drunk dancing involved and celeb groupies.

On Thursday evening I was given a VIP front row seat to the Vintage Valentino show that was being held at Downtown Los Angeles Fashion Week.  Here in the States, L.A. Fashion Week is considered a joke (sad).  So I wasn’t asked to cover anything anyway.  But this lovely person had bought this ticket and at the last minute couldn’t go and I was the lucky tush that got her seat.  I love Valentino.  I own “The Last Emperor” on DVD and haven’t watched it yet.  But I think his clothes are spectacular and I felt honored to attend.  It was also going to be great seeing the red carpet from afar and lovely not to have to rush home and be up until 5am transcribing my interviews.

I didn’t have anything even close to couture, let alone Valentino couture, and I was sitting in the front row!  But, I had a hunch that this being L.A. and not the hottest of fashion meccas, that if I looked snazzy enough, I’d be okay.  So, I put on a really fab All Saints top that is very Westwood, did my eyes up in fab colors going with my Russian Revolution trend (Read Russian Revolution post for the hottest beauty trend this fall!) and did my hair so I could put in a peacock feather headband that went with my trend alert for hair adornments (Read “Tress-Chic” post for the hottest trends for hair this fall!).  This old set of digits didn’t look half bad

I’m not in the best state at the moment due to work anxiety and was really nervous about showing up to a party without anyone.  A lot of these folks knew each other or were in the biz and so I sort of wandered around aimlessly (though some people were very kind and stopped to chat with me about my top!).  L.A. is such a weird place when it comes to getting dressed.  I arrived looking very London I suppose, and they came looking like—I dunno—I hate to say it—but very…errrmmm…seductive.  The girls were either really blinged out or wearing skin-tight, short dresses with their business hanging out.  And the make-up—oh my god!  Talk about caked on!  It’s just a different beast out here.

Anyway, I was led to my seat which was in a prime location, and it had a goodie bag sitting on it (always fun).  There were Coca-Cola girls in red-sequined dresses walking around with trays of soda for our comfort and it was really laid back.  The opening act for the show was a Brit named Matt Goss.  He has a show in Vegas and he is like a funky Frank Sinatra.  He was amazing!  His music rocked and he had showgirls that danced around him—he gave 100% and it was brilliant.

Our lovely Coke girl and you can see the front row and the goodie bags!!!

I have never heard of him, but evidently he's #13 in the UK charts and has a big show at the Palms in Las Vegas. Anyway, the guy was great and his dancers were very sexy!

Then the catwalk show began.  I was so let down.  You’ll see by the pics what I mean.  Valentino must have a conservatory of clothes that would make any fashionista’s heart stop.  The woman who threw the fashion show actually had collected and owned all the pieces so I understand that Valentino hadn’t leant or chosen the clothes himself.  But my god, the choices were atrocious.  The theme was red and black (never a good move) and the era’s were a mess.  Some of the dresses looked like bad 80’s disasters that I’m sure Maestro Valentino wished never resurfaced.  And the way they were styled!  The girls looked like they were Christmas tress with ornaments on them. The models were so second rate.  They had bad skin, they walked poorly, their faces were “whatever.”  And whoever did their make-up—I could have done better!  It looked like they had grease paint smeared on as foundation with heavy red lips and heavy black eyes.  That’s so dated! The hair looked oily and matted—it was bad.  I saw all of the faces in the front row and everyone was in shock!!!   The show had 2 dresses that I would have liked—but not pined for—and in a fashion show—you should be drooling.  I’ll show you the dresses that burnt my eyeballs out of their sockets they were so ugly first and at the end of my post, I’ll show you the two dresses I liked.  Here goes:

I wouldn't have been caught dead in this when it was created! And the model--seriously?

I don't know if this was Valentino's take on a Spanish-style dress gone-80's but OMG! It looks like it is a costume. And so tacky!!!

I think if they threw some tinsel and some candy canes on her it would have been perfect! Ugh and look at her make-up.

I had to include this because I was wondering if Valentino was even trying when he created this and also whomever picked the model to wear this---did they not see it didn't fit her well? Oh, and I'm sorry again to be cruel, but does SHE have the face of a model to you?

The end of the show--thank god! Look how Goth and scary they look. This would have Valentino crying off all of that orange paint he has on his face!

Afterwards, I had a cocktail, spoke to a few people, had a person I knew from the media take a photo of ME on the red carpet with my camera (very funny) and I drove home pleased as punch that I got out and could kick off my heels—but gave the night a fair go.  I wish evenings like that were more common for me…just nice and chilled out.

If you’re wondering what was in the goodie bag, it was very disappointing.  The goodie bags in L.A. are so second rate compared to Blighty! Let’s see, there was a brand of skincare I never heard of that gave a night serum, wipes for your pet, a sample size of Paul Mitchell hair cream, foot petals for your heels and a CD from Matt Goss that I got him to sign for my brother.  I think they could have AT LEAST put SOMETHING Valentino in there!

Anywhooo….I’m thrilled to be able to actually share what a night out for me is like in L.A.  Leave me a comment to let me know what you thought about the show and that you agree the models are DIRE!  Enjoy and I’ll see you tomorrow with my own bit of fashion with a brand new “Wish List.”

PS: Here are the 2 dresses I liked:

I really liked this because of the layering, the material and the adorable cape. Do I think it is pure genius? No. But it is pretty damned cute and I'd dig it if someone bought it for me But really, it's the cape that makes it.

This is the only dress that said "Valentino" to me. It was his classic red. It was perfectly cut. It was feminine and elegant and wait till you see the back. This is a dress that would blow a man away when he opened the front door to pick you up for a black-tie affair.

You make a great entrance, but man, look at that exit. Your ass looks like heaven and your shoulders and back are stellar. This is an A+ and I'm not surprised they ended the show with this. Perfection.

Dedicatedly yours,

—One of 365

Dear Ethers,

In many of my posts I have mentioned that I will, in time, explain my absolute obsession for Sienna Miller.  Today is sadly, not that day.  However, the outfit I chose for this week brought out her old boho spirit thrown in with a little of Ms. Moss. It just felt right to dedicate this Friday to these phenoms of fashion. This outfit brought me such joy to put on.  It reminded me of how I would dress up and go out for a night in London (something I miss dearly).  A tunic, some boots and a funky belt.  I’d get my bag sorted, slam my Oyster card down at the Tube and head towards town on the Northern line getting off at Charing Cross and then walk towards Covent Garden or wherever the lights would take me.  Ethers, I really felt like I was back in Blighty posing for this one

For many of you this will not be to your liking.  You’ll think the tunic is way too short, the belt a nightmare out of the 80’s and the boots something out of a Sci-Fi film.  But for me, this outfit spells Soho on a Saturday night.  It spells Sienna Miller when she was dating Jude.  It has Kate Moss written all over it when she went to Glastonbury.  And that’s why, folks, I fucking love it.  So, no made up back story for our girl tonight.  This girl is ME….living out her dream as a fashionista back in a town she misses terribly and paying homage to the creative outlets and outfits that London is so famous for.

So to you Sienna, Kate and all you Topshop girls in Brick Lane who wear corsets with leopard leggings and tutu’s over them—Viva La London Fashion!!!!!  And hey, to all you Brits out there, maybe whisper the name One of 365 tonight at the pub.  I could use the big-up and I’d love it if the city that owns my soul was reminded that I still think of it everyday.

Dedicatedly yours,

—One of 365

Damn right if I bent over you'd see WAY too much! And that tunic in the sun might be see-through. But dammit, while I'm still young enough and can say I did it, I want to be a bonkers, boho, beatnik too! And the best part about the bloody thing? It is so comfortable.

This is a silk tunic I got from Zara years ago for 15 quid. I love it because you can wear it over leggings, or with sandals and hey---like me---with boots. It's light as a feather and I love the multi-color green/grey effect. You can wear a slip underneath it if you're a bit shy about things being sheer, and it also comes with its own tie so you don't need your own belt. Zara Silk Tunic, 15 quid, London

Ok. Many of you are recoiling at the site of this. Older folks who dumped a belt like this and gave it to Oxfam/Goodwill are wondering who paid good money for this crap? I DID! And I LOVE IT! Look how good it looks with the tunic! It just adds that boho crazy vibe--that rock-star chic. It's badass and I think it is so outrageous, it's cool. It's fashion, baby. Vintage Belt, 8 quid, Camden Stalls (Where Else!!!!)

Knee-high boots are really in this season. I really like the dove-grey color and the patent finish. They also have a great almond-shaped toe and a little bump of a heel so you could walk miles in them. They look sick with tights and great with bare legs. I like how they bring out the silvery-grey in the tunic and just tie the whole swinger-Carnaby vibe out of the outfit. If I had Kate's legs I think they'd look way hotter, but alas, I must make do. Grey Patent Boots, Originally $411 Reduced to $100, Due Farina, American Rag, Los Angeles

Say hello to YOUR little friend! At a mere 3,000 pounds sterling this Matriochka Russian Enamel Bracelet Bag is the beginning of the Russian Revolution hitting the runways this fall. If you wanna be hip to the catch, you better bring out Babushka's old scarves because at these prices, we're talking a Faberege lifestyle and in this recession, it ain't gonna happen (at least this for this 3 digit lady). But one way you CAN emulate the look is through your beauty wardrobe. I'm reporting on the latest beauty trend: The Cold War Russian With Money! And you don't have to spend a ton of rubles to look like a million rubles! Ahhh if Gorbachev could see me now....too bad he's lugging around all that LV luggage (what was up with that ad?!)

Dear Ether, 

I’ve been checking out the beauty trends coming up for this fall.  It looks like it’s going to be Cold War Russia, but this time these Soviets are gonna be able to show off what they’ve got without having to worry about being turned into the authorities for digging Western culture and its riches.  Chanel is even dedicating their collection to the land of borscht this season!

It’s about being over the top with big hair (we’re talking mousse making a comeback and hairspray becoming a staple of your beauty wardrobe—screw the ozone)—the higher the coif the closer to heaven!  And eyes, eyes, eyes!  Smudges of kohl all the way to your temples and colors that you didn’t even know were possible to create in shadow form going all the way up in 3 tone layers to your brow bone.  And if it glitters girl, pile it on, because if you shine you are on trend.  And remember how frosted lips were something out of a Bret Easton Ellis novel?  No more!  Marc Jacobs was showing pastels with a pearlized frost that would make you wish you hadn’t thrown out all of those Wet N’ Wild tubes you thought were make-up corpses. And the paler the skin the better the canvas to highlight the hues on your face.  Would you wear this look to the market?  No.  Would you even wear this look to a dinner party?  Again, probably not.  This is definitely a runway look that is for younger folks wanting to make a statement at a nightclub or major event.  I don’t even see film stars emulating this—though they may exaggerate smoky eyes and play with color a bit more. 

Wowza! She's got it all. The pale skin, the kohl eyes, the 80's blusher, the multi-color shadow tiers all the way up to the brow-bone. And the hair. Not only has she re-worked the chignon, but also the quiff in the front. This girl better not stand too close to anything flammable because that coif will go up in flames in 2 seconds with all of that hairspray infused in it. But, she is a PRIME example of our 80's Russian girl working it!

This is directly from the Marc Jacobs show. Notice the frosted lips, the really heavily shaded eyes and the lilac, luminized cheeks. Everything is so exaggerated, including her hair. The skin is so pale, so that the eyes are really the attention grabber. Her hair almost looks like it's been dyed gray because of all of the product that's been sprayed in it. Super drama. Major 80's. If you'd wanna copy this look it is workable. Just take away the wing part at the brow bone and keep the shadowing on the lid and under the eye. For more eye drama, try fake black lashes, or pile on the mascara. Keep the skin pale, but instead of using a lilac shade of blush, go for a pinker color and use a luminizer that is less pearlized and more glowing. With the lips add a buttery gloss. You'll get a great effect, but not so icy and dramatic.

Besides the bonkers hair, I actually think this is the most realistic makeup from the runway. The make-up is by Nars. It is really "done" of course, but it isn't totally impossible to wear. I think the double cat eye kohl is really a cute idea and I like the color hues that have been chosen. She doesn't look so severe and deathly pale. I wouldn't go for the pinkish shadow OVER the eyebrow (yikes) but I do like what's happening with the profile. Is this an everyday look--again--no, but I think if you are trying to make a statement and want to capture the runway, this is the most feasible. Again, sans the hair.

Great brands that have color palettes that would really rock it hard would be Mac, Shu Uemura and Nars.  These guys are always on the cutting edge of color and you won’t have to worry about losing out in terms of choices.  Mac Pigments are my favorite.  They are shimmery and come in fab colors so you get the best of both worlds.  Just make sure to blow on the brush once you’ve dipped it in the pigment—a little goes a long way and the dust falls easily on your face.  A fan brush is a good solution if you DO get pigment spillage on cheeks or under eyes.  Try pigments “Golden Olive” mixed with “Deep Blue Green” if you have brown eyes.  This color combo will be slightly “out there” but still classy enough to not look too bonkers.  I also always advocate as a kohl liner Mac “Smolder.”  I have been using it for years and never deviate.  It is the best in terms of smudge-ability and it lasts the night.  It’s also a deep black so it will act as the perfect frame for your color canvas.  If you really want to go wild, try the Shu Uemura false eyelash route.    In their Tokyo Lash Bar 2009 they have a pair called “Marine Tide” that are supposed to emulate a wave from the sea and they are the most amazing shades of blue and white.  They also have a wonderful bend and curl making them even more striking.  Imagine that with deep, smoky black eyes—major statement!  But check out their other options at http://bit.ly/waZDy and pick from dozens of spectacular works of art to make your own decision about how you want to play it up.  

I’ve always been a color girl.  I’ve been using pigments since their inception and love playing with layers of shading.  I’m a believer of the statement eye.  Many people believe in a clean, classic look with a taupe shadow, bronzer/blusher, mascara, and a lovely tinted gloss.  That’s just not me.  I think you can get the same classy look with a lot more funk.  So, I’m really psyched that in the dreary season ahead color is embraced.  But, as always, runway looks are exaggerated.  Take these ideas and play around.  The best way to gage how make-up is being worked from the runway to the “real-way” is by watching the celebs as I mentioned earlier.  A-lister make-up artists know how to strike the balance and will guide you to making the trend normal and glamorous without looking like Zsa Zsa Gabor!  Who knew the Kremlin would be so influential this season? 

Nostrovia!

Look how colorful the Kremlin is! I wonder if this is where the designers and the make-up artists got their palette inspirations from. Those wonderful onion turrets are so fantastic, and so on trend! The Kremlin is, like, so HOT, right now!

Dedicatedly yours, 

—One of 365